Controlling your emotional state is an important component of a happy and successful life. A change of residence, job, profession, or family status won’t lead to dramatic changes if you don’t work on your emotional intelligence. Let’s analyze in detail how to learn to control emotions, what are the techniques and mistakes.
Why It’s Necessary
If emotions aren’t controlled, they will dominate a person. He can become destructive, distracted, and will go against even his own principles. People who don’t know how to work with their emotional state, impulsively make rash decisions, which they later regret.
Emotions are that part of the psychological process, which in a moment can take you by surprise, destroy life plans and connection with people. When a person frequently responds to his feelings, the real perception of the world is dulled. He loses understanding of himself, his values and desires.
Lack of control paralyzes the will. As a result, a person becomes weak, dependent on situations. To become self-confident, to make only balanced decisions, you need to know how to cope with emotional pressure.
Effective Techniques
Self-development
The more immersed in work, study, household chores, the less time is left for living emotions. Load yourself with tasks, try to learn something, like playing online roulette NZ, think of important things to do that will be useful. Make your thinking work in a different direction, for the benefit of your own development.
Detach Yourself From the Situation
Often negative emotions are manifested when discontent, evil thoughts, or the bad mood of one person is discharged on another. Thinking is so organized that the offender wants to repay the same “coin”.
This is an adequate defense reaction. But in order not to aggravate the circumstances, it’s recommended to ignore the monologue of the aggressor. It’s necessary to distract from the interlocutor or leave altogether. Let him come to himself, cool down.
Breathe
A banal but effective technique. If you feel a strong emotional influx, apply the square technique:
- Inhale.
- Hold your breath.
- Exhale.
- Breath hold.
Each point should last 4 seconds each. Stop the exercise as soon as your heart rate levels out. Then relief will come.
Learn to Pause
Here you cannot do with the words “Stop fidgeting”. The main purpose of the technique is to stop the emotional outburst by switching to finding out the cause. What exactly led to such a state, what question or answer of the interlocutor.
Don’t rush to say the first thought that comes to mind. Weigh whether this is what you wanted to convey to the person.
Watch Your Facial Expressions
The technique of monitoring facial expressions is used successfully in important negotiations, stress or conflict. Trick your thinking. If you find yourself starting to feel aggressive, smile.
A small smirk will signal to the brain that everything isn’t so bad, and the inner state will “mirror”. Don’t force a smile out of yourself, just remember or imagine a funny situation. Don’t let anger control the state.
Use an Alarm Clock
Set aside one hour a day for worrying. For example, set your alarm clock for 8 pm. At this time, allow yourself to get angry and worry about the past day. According to studies, psychologists have found that soon the emotional heat subsides, and a person has no desire to spend hours of rest on meaningless actions.
Muscle Relaxation
At the first feeling of mastery of negative emotions, you should sharply tense the entire muscle mass. Be in this state until you feel a decline in strength. With muscle relaxation, the psychological tension will go away.
Typical Mistakes
Blocking
You shouldn’t ignore your emotional outburst, no matter how it was – positive or negative. Accumulated feelings will sooner or later come out in greater volume. This can lead to deep depression, rash actions, and deterioration of health.
Shifting Responsibility
Don’t justify yourself, your actions or words with feelings. Such a mistake is made even by those who are confident in full control of their condition. Which in the situation is a deep misconception. Emotions aren’t an excuse.
Reprogramming for Positivity
If a person with different feelings will regularly tune himself to a positive mood, there is a possibility that soon the harsh realities of life will sink him in the lack of understanding “what and why it happens.”
Summary
Managing your feelings and emotions is a skill that takes years to develop. Regular work on yourself will allow you to own your life, become a happy and balanced person. Self-regulation techniques will improve not only the quality of life, but will also have a positive effect on health and general condition.
Remember that there is always a distance between the stimulus and the reaction of human thinking. The more conscious a person is about the emotional background, the greater this gap.
